Blog Struggles
One of my ongoing preoccupations concerning blogging is the divisions between the public, personal and private sphere.
When I started blogging in February 2001, I decided that I would not write an intensely private blog nor a confessional blog. I would not write about my work, about my family or friends nor about my personal life. Sometimes I admittedly stray close to the line, but I always make sure I feel comfortable with the idea that total strangers will read what I write. Nowadays I feel comfortable sharing pictures of myself or mentioning my live-in boyfriend, but it was not always so. The lines are not etched in stone, but can be moved slightly depending upon circumstance.
The first big shift happened in 2005 when my then literary blog attracted the attention of a mentally ill man who managed to track down my real name and address through clever net detective work. He proceeded to stalk me in the physical world as well as bombard me with attention online. I learned that no matter how hard I tried, I could not stop him from reading "clues" where I had intended none. The man mistook my personal blog voice for the actual private woman. It felt like a violation - but once the stalking had been resolved (thank you, Copenhagen police), I began to reassess blogging and what I wanted to achieve. Looking back, I began to let my guards down the following months and (coincidence or not?) a long-term online friendship blossomed into a long-term romantic relationship still going strong.
Fourth Edition blurs the lines even more. I suppose it belongs to the "craft blogs" section of the blogosphere, but I also write about matters that were once strictly off-limits. Many of my regular readers know me in "real life" which is a new sensation. I post pictures, whine about really wanting a dog and I share what I create. It feels quite intimate, you know. However, I have come to realise that whilst some barriers have fallen, others have sprung up. Because the lines between my blog persona and Me have become almost invisible, I feel much more responsible for what I write. I also feel intensely protective about my innermost thoughts and experiences. I used to think: "I need to blog this" whenever I experienced something. Nowadays I think: "how can I blog this?" I hope you can spot the subtle difference.
I am reflecting upon this because I read so many courageous blogs written by people who feel brave enough to share themselves and their experiences with others. I have stories I wish I felt okay writing about, but since I can no longer hide behind (relative) anonymity, I feel extremely uncomfortable with the idea. To be honest, I sometimes wonder if I can go on blogging (although I would miss it if I were to pull the plug) because of the conflation between my self and my blog persona.
So I post pictures of socks.
Thank you for reading - some of you have been along for the ride for almost a decade - and hopefully I will soon figure out how to blog once more.
Going Places
Crocheting Adventures with Hyperbolic Planes, a book on how to make geometric models using needlepoint, has won a prize given to oddly-titled books.
Written by Latvian mathematician Daina Taimina, it was adjudged the winner of the annual Diagram Prize after a public vote run by the Bookseller magazine.
I think it says a lot about me that I didn't batter an eyelid at the title. Besides, Crocheting Adventures with Hyperbolic Planes does not hold a candle to books like Highlights in the History of Concrete or Bombproof Your Horse, both previous winners.
I finished my Monkey socks this weekend. They are very pink/lilac, but they do warm my feet (perfect for that impending snow we are supposedly getting). I'm just happy I won't have to use the Yarn Yard Bonny again. Just too synthetic for my taste. I have wound two cakes of delicious sock yarn - The Thylacine's Wellington BFL/nylon and Old Maiden Aunt's merino 4ply - and have scoured Ravelry for sock patterns. Like Ms Mooncalf, I think it is time to admit that sock knitting is no longer abhorrent or strange. It certainly has a place in my life.
Some exciting news: I will be teaching knitting and crochet classes in Glasgow this spring. Topics include the usual beginners' courses in both knitting and crochet, but also some advanced courses such as Continental knitting, Fair-Isle knitting combining English & Continental techniques, beading, finishing techniques and, yes, sock knitting . I'll be posting more info on the Glasgow and Scots Knits Ravelry groups soon or contact me directly if you want to know more. All the courses will last one hour and are free. Woohoo!
Finally, two blog posts about how we relate to our bodies. Kate Davies writes eloquently about how to formulate and describe the relationship (particularly if you have fallen ill) whilst Lilith of Old Maiden Aunt writes about feeling disconnected from her body. Both posts ask pertinent questions to which I can relate. I wish I felt ready to write about my personal struggles in terms of body and mind, but maybe someday I feel comfortable adding my thoughts. I thank both Kate and Lilith for being bolder than me.
Oopsie.
Some days the internet should be taken away from me. I am feeling delicate, emotional and fragile in a chocolate-eating sense and now I have purchased yarn from online vendors. One skein of merino sock from The Thylacine in a dark green colour called "Wellington" (and Wellington, NZ is my favouritest city on earth) and one skein of luscious, sinful Malabrigo in Azul Bolita (which looks remarkably like an Yves Klein Blue on this monitor and, yes, it is my favouritest blue).
And I am supposed to be cold sheeping.
Truth be told, I abandoned my no-more-yarn pledge earlier this month as I came across an incredibly good offer on some old yarn and promptly spent £2 on 20 balls (I told you it was a good deal and I have plans for it all. Honestly). Somehow I think I need to revisit my cold sheep pledge..
In case you are wondering, the Good Deal yarn is going to go towards a lot of small projects: scarves, hats, cowls and mitts. Presents as well as stuff for myself. The Azul Bolita will turn into the Snapdragon hat as it will look fabulous with my bright green coat (yes, I frequently dress as though I am either colourblind or deliberately out to scare children). The sock yarn will .. become socks of the sock variety.
Tomorrow I will stay away from yarn outlets. Okay, that won't happen for a number of reasons but I will at least make a concerted effort to forget my Paypal account password. Now where is my chocolate?
Dictionary Definition
uncool /ˌʌnˈkuːl/
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when you take a photo from a Ravelry user's notebook and upload it to your blog without seeking permission.
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See also: cool (Antonym)
Usage example:
"Seeing my disembodied self on a foreign-language blog was really uncool," said the knitter
Photo taken down with apology. Thank you.
(Ain’t) Misbehavin’
I like late nights. I like staying up till the world around us grow quiet and I can hear myself thinking. I like caffeinated drinks: coffee, tea and various soft drinks. And I like working away until I finish things and then have a long, meandering chat with the Boyfriend. Unfortunately my body does not agree with me and so today I am incredibly shattered to the point that I began crying in public today for no apparent reason. Embarrassing, yes, and also worrying.
Pledge to myself: I'll quit misbehaving and begin listening to my body again. Everything else is just plain silliness and I'm too old to be silly.
A few random links:
- Les Garcons de Glasgow. A Glasgow street style blog. I'm slightly unsettled by how many of these people I know (sort of) and how many photos have been taken in our neighbourhood. Also: looking like a drunk East German hairdresser circa 1983 is really not cute (or go the whole way and get yourself a Trabi)
- Caring for Your Intro-Vert: I spent years and years thinking I was a quiet extro-vert. Yeah, I know. Link via Anna.
- Interior Design from Scandinavia. My old Copenhagen flat looked like a cluttered version of this photo. You can take a girl out of Scandinavia..
- And if you are in London, make sure to catch the V&A exhibition on quilting. It looks fabulous and I wish I lived close enough to actually make my merry way there. So catch it on my behalf, mm?
Finding Serenity
Lest you think I am a complete slacker, here is photographic proof of my knitting efforts.
My Frankie Says .. jumper is no more and instead I have opted for a long-loved pattern from Rowan Studio 15, Serenity. My knitting mojo has been AWOL recently, so I was thrilled when I found myself yearning to work on this cardigan. It is a little cropped cardigan and I am really enjoying knitting it. One of the best things about knitting something in pieces is how often you finish a section and feel really smug about your progress. I am one back and one sleeve done, and hope to have this cardigan done by the end of the month. Unfortunately I have too many things happening this week for me to aim for completion by the weekend.
However, with Serenity well under way and my second pair of socks almost done (I need turn the heel on the second Monkey and then finish the foot), it is time to look ahead. I have been going through my stash and looked through patterns. This is what I am contemplating:
- Corsica from Rowan Summer Crochet. I liked the pattern photo, but this version on Ravelry blew me away. I am trying to steer away from making everything red, so I am currently torn between Siena in 665 Lustre (somewhere between lime green and peridot green) or Organic 4ply in either Oak Bark (a strange, but beautiful grey-brown) or natural undyed. Still undecided.
- A pair of socks knitted in Old Maiden Aunt Strange Rock'n'Rollers (merino). When Lilith mentioned the colourway, I knew I had to work with it as it takes its name from one of my favourite songs (youtube link) in one of my favourite films. Patternwise, I'm leaning towards Twisted from the brand-new Knitty or possibly a self-designed pattern if I can muster the mental energy.
- A shawl of some description. The usual suspects apply, plus a new contender. I have several, several yarns in mind: Kauni in purple/fuchsia, my precious 1-ply kidmohair/merino, the yak laceweight C. gave me for Christmas, Malabrigo lace, Old Maiden Aunt alpaca/merino laceweight, Kidsilk Haze, my Shetland laceweight, cashmere .. you get why I've joined a 10 shawls in 2010 group, right?
- The Snapdragon hat because although spring has arrived, spring in Scotland equals cold winds. I have a couple of contenders here too. Either 100 purewool worsted merino in Forest, the leftovers from my Forecast cardigan or some delicious Norfolk Pure-Coloured Texel yarn I received in a swap. I'm pondering matching fingerless mitts.
And I have a birthday shawl to start/finish before mid-June too. I better get a move on.
PS. Title? Yes, I'm a Browncoat.
Shall I Compare Thee to the Great Pele?
After the years of Andrew Motion being poet laureate, him whining about it and his "official" poems going "Better stand back / Here’s an age attack, / But the second in line / Is dealing with it fine", it is a relief to have Carol Ann Duffy in the seat. Somehow she seems to understand the job better and is able to find poetry in the small things that fill our everyday lives (which, I would argue, is what poetry is all about) and the news story flickering on our screens.
Recently she wrote a poem about David Beckham's injury which sees him out of the England World Cup squad.
Achilles (for David Beckham)
Myth's river- where his mother dipped him, fished him, a slippery golden boyflowed on, his name on its lips. Without him, it was prophesised,
they would not take Troy.Women hid him, concealed him in girls' sarongs; days of sweetmeats, spices, silver songs...
but when Odysseus came,with an athlete's build, a sword and a shield, he followed him to the battlefield, the crowd's roar,
and it was sport, not war,Advertisement - article continues below »
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his charmed foot on the ball...
but then his heel, his heel, his heel...
The poem was originally published in The Daily Mirror, a tabloid, which employs Duffy as a regular columnist. Meanwhile, The Guardian, my newspaper of choice, looks at the poem approvingly but the comments section is where I found the biggest thrills. I particularly enjoyed FinneyontheWing, IantovonScranto and tw*tbeak but I strongly recommend the entire section. It is filled with limp poetry, bizarre imagery and iambic pentameter.
Careful with Words
I'm not a huge gadget fan, but I love my green iPod, Darth Kermit. It's an old model, but it does the job every morning as I'm going to and fro work. However, I am yet to figure a way to make suitable playlists for Darth Kermit. I tend to make my playlists in the evenings when I'm a bit tired, a bit dozy and generally comfortable and content. This results in chilled-out playlists. Unfortunately I am in need of wake-me-up music in the mornings - preferably of the sparkly pop variety. I have tried to steer my playlist making in that general direction, but to no avail.
Anyway, I have been listening to knitting podcasts instead. I listen to a lot of different ones - both current ones as well as a lot of old ones. I was listening to a relatively current one when I was jolted out of my morning sleepiness by the podcaster describing someone as being a bit "spazzy". Now, I realise that British English and American English are two very different things. I also realise that whilst I find expressions such as "that's spazzy" or "that's gay" very offensive, these types of expressions are accepted among certain young people who do not mean to be derogatory or offensive. The question is: do I contact the podcaster and point out that I find her language offensive .. or should I just let it slide and get less serious about words and meanings? I'm reminded of Josh Rouse's The White Trash Period of My Life in which he sings careful with words .. they are so meaningful. It is one of those songs I should never put on my iPod morning mix and yet I do.
My inbox delivered some delightful surprises this morning - lovely previews of the new Kim Hargreaves book, Misty, and the forthcoming Amy Butler yarn range - so even though I was stuck with melancholy songs and surprisingly derogatory knitting podcasts, I could enjoy my morning coffee and scone feeling a bit cheerful.
The Other Things In Life
First of all, a huge thank you to Fineskylark and Paula. Ms Fineskylark sent me these gorgeous oak buttons (made in her part of Canada) and Paula has given me the official (and very cute) Ravelympics 2010 pin starring Ravelry's mascot, Bob the Boston Terrier. Thank you, ladies.
I wish I could say that I knew exactly which cardigan calls for those oak buttons, but my knitting mojo has gone AWOL. I'm about to graft the toe of the first Monkey sock, but my Frankie Says .. pullover is languishing in my knitting bag. I love the pattern, I love the yarn but I'm beginning to have second thoughts regarding the shape of the pullover. I'm, well, "top-heavy", as the professionals say, and I'm unsure whether a cropped pullover in quite heavy silk/cotton will do my figure any favours. I'm beginning to eye Blithe from Rowan 47, but I'm not quite ready to change my project just yet. I might need to talk this over with my knitting group.
Moving on.
I was disappointed in humanity when I came across this MetaFilter post about a recently discovered mass grave in England discovering during work on the 2012 Olympics site. The grave contained over fifty beheaded Vikings, possibly killed during the St. Brice's Day massacre in 1002AD. My disappointment arose after reading several MeFi comments of the "Vikings, LOL!" variety. I know this may come as a surprise to people who generally know Vikings as bloodthirsty barbarians from films, comics or Christian monks' annals, but, hey, they were actual human beings. Actual human beings who were my ancestors and I fail to find the funny side in beheadings or mass-graves. Show some respect, please. The only good thing that came of the entire Viking thread on MeFi was a link to Star Wars re-written as a saga .. in Old Norse. Now that's hardcore.
Finally, I'm trying to decide whether to go see A Single Man or, ahem, Legion. I need to make my mind up quickly as I suspect neither will be shown in cinemas for much longer..
The Little Things In Life
First, the obligatory "It is Spring!" photo. Of course I am convinced we will soon see a return to snowy gloom and doom, but I do enjoy being able to walk outside wearing less than five layers.
Secondly, a sock. My first pair were a bonafide success and so I think I need another pair to keep my toes warm at night (it's more hygienic for one thing). I'm using The Yarn Yard Bonny which I bought almost two years ago. Yes, the colourway looked very, very different on the website, but at least there is very little pooling. It is not nowhere as nice to knit with as the Araucania Ranco I used for my Ravelympics project either. I actually tried to swap the Bonny yarn about three weeks ago but nobody cared.. and so it is now becoming a pair of Monkey socks.
And Larry is done! I was putting the final few touches to him on Knit Night Tuesday when we realised that Larry really likes dancing about to silly pop songs. You should see those thin legs swagger. More seriously, I can see a few things wrong with Larry but they are my mistakes (damn time constraints) and not pattern mistakes. It was a fun little project, but I'm not rushing to knit another sheep (besides, Larry would get jealous). Larry will leave Casa Bookish for good tomorrow and I wish him a pleasant new life.
Finally, take a look at Hermes' collection at the Paris Fashion week. It's enough to make my knees wobble with love. Cor.